Friday, May 03, 2002

Nothing Happened today...Oh Well.

I started delivering the prints today... fortunatly it's been a love fest. But then again I just dropped things of at places I knew. I do need to reshoot one exterior so I'll do that Monday night... or so that's the plan... No extra money but happy customers.

That's about all I have to say tonight...Ed

Thursday, May 02, 2002

No stalker dairy entry today...that's the first step.

Not really much of anything. I'm just trying to get all the photos and invoices out so I can get paid for all that shooting or more so so I can stop thinking people are going to pay me and I can get on with being poor.

Oh well Maybe something will happen tomorrow...Ed

Wednesday, May 01, 2002

Well I guess letting other people know that the request to sell the posters to the mall stores was turned down worked. I had a voice mail asking me to get more info on dealing with this woman. Yeah for me...I mean it's not like I get any money for it... but it'll be like next time I come up with a great image people will realize what we can do with it. Also I can go into the store with some one and say see that's my poster. I've always wanted to do a Breakfast at Tiffany's Public Library scene.

I don't want to turn this into some stalker diary, I mean I so easily could but I won't. So let me just say I didn't use my chance to Hello to the mystery girl this morning. We both walked in at the same time, yes I did speed up walking across the parking lot when I saw it was her. I opened both doors down the garage corridor. I did get a thanks but no small talk. So that's it with Mystery Girl unless I actually find out her name... No make it if I'm told her name. Just say No to Stalking!...Ed

Tuesday, April 30, 2002

Well it's been three weeks since I last wrote in this thing... I meant to write but I'd be all I'm to tired I don't want to. But like most things when you finally sit down and get started you feel a whole lot better.
I've been on a pretty good Karmic wave here lately, the work from the showhouse, which if people actually pay will get me 1 card closer to being debt free, there's a goal to have. People have been really complementary about my work and it's actually coming from people I respect or total strangers, both equally good sources. The other day I had this woman who owns 2 poster stores in the local malls call and say she wanted to be the wholesale distributor of the bridge poster I did. But the head of the department wants to keep the operation in house. "... don't want to diminish our product" he says. Oh well I guess I could do one for this woman to carry (have to check with the legal team)
Did this shoot the other week for a friend's store. Lots of fun it was good to see I could do work that I enjoy and make good photos. Now they're talking (I don't know how seriously) about making a video to play during the stores reopening. Kind of a performance art/comercial/ happening... it'd be fun to be a part of I think. That's what I think I've been missing is the being part of something. Yeah I work for the magazine but I don't feel part of it. We don't do things together or have a shared vision or destination it's just a bunch of people making work and if it all happens to go together it's a plus.

I guess the think that would round out this little Karmic wave is a little romantic interest, well there is this girl sales who's caught my eye, but all I ever really see is her walking away or getting into the elevator. Though yesterday she did wave/acknowledge me and Jay in the parking lot, though I' sure it was just her sheilding her eyes from the glare off Jay's head (Yes that's mean on so many levels but it keeps me from being some psycho stalker). I told Joyce that I wish I was better friends with Danielle since her computer had the master employee book on it so I could find out her name. I mean that would be so much more normal than say walking up to her and going hi.

In My world it'd go something like this:
Girl is standing in the hall waiting for the elevator
I walk up and stand beside her

Me: "Going up or down?"

Her:" Huh... Oh down."

Me:"Ok...umm (long pause)...Hi I'm Ed I'm the photographer with..."

Her:[in hushed whisper]"Hold it stop right there I know where this is going and just forget about it!
Don't even ask... I'm married, I'm Gay, I'm a nun...I want nothing to do with you I didn't even want to know your name, and now that I know it that's even more information I have to forget about you. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!."

Head down looking at floor trying to think of some way to get away


Her:No!don't look at me don't even acknowledge my presence and if you ever get this close to me again I'll.."

Elevator doors open

She turns and smiles to the 3 people in the elevator and enters

People stare at me while the doors close

Most people fantasize about how great the meeting will go. Me I just go for the worst and then there's no need to go through with it... easier that way. It just keeps the Courts paperwork levels down

It's not a downer it's just how I stay insane...Ed

Thursday, April 04, 2002

Why do I let crazy people bother me? I ran into this designer today and she goes when do you know when we're going to shoot my room? and I say Well when I talked to you on Monday we set it up for Tuesday (day before yesterday) Oh? I don't remember... well it sounded like you were writing it down. Well we'll have to reshoot. She's having Judy shoot right now and then want's me to shoot also? Why? does she feel some obligation? if she wants Judy to shoot fine, I'll just sell the shots to the builder and say I've gotten 2 shots done.

ARRRGHHHHH! I know this woman's crazy but each time I deal with her I say oh she's gotten her act together now, but No she's just as flakey as the last time. Why do I let this happen I could easily say Oh I've already filled all my slots for that, you'll have to get some one else. Instead I say sure I can do that no problem and I'll still be available when you stand me up and have to reschedual again.

Just say NO!...Ed

Wednesday, April 03, 2002

I don't know if it's coming down off of a mania or if it's burn out but I really don't feel like doing much of anything right now. I want to believe I'm coming to a crossroads at work where they'll go one way and I'll go another. Not that I'm prepared to go anywhere. Why can't I accept that where I am is OK, sure it's got things I don't like but so does every job. People say you've got to pay your dues... sure I'm for that but how long do you have to pay them? I mean I accept I'm not the best photographers in town but I'd think I'd do a lot more freelance work or have people at least inquriering. About the only thing I get are "do you shoot pets?" I guess I am in a funk because I don't really feel like bitching about it....Ed

Monday, April 01, 2002

After listening to a story on NPR about checking people out on Google (slang Googled some body) I decided to check myself out again and after finally coming up with the right combinations I found my self, I was #4 the magazine's web page and #13 SCAD's where are they now pages. Not much but still it's something, also I never realized how many people with my name are photographers. Don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing? Just a thing I guess...Ed